Nomulous Blog

Funerals, as they are commonly practiced, are the worst, most shallow and unloving possible way of saying goodbye to a loved one. We immediately pay to have their bodies desecrated by total strangers and filled with toxic chemicals. We buy outrageously expensive, uncomfortable clothes simply because most people think we should, and would be offended if we didn’t, thinking we severely lacked either respect or money. We pay professional caterers to cook us terrible, loveless food, just for decoration and comfort. We pay florists to kill beautiful creatures so that we may observe their carefully arranged, professional prettiness for an afternoon, before they are thrown in the garbage to rot. We go to people who make a living organizing and hosting funeral after funeral, and we pay them just to be in the space they give us while we say our goodbyes. They are happy to get rid of us, and at the end convey their (most sincere) condolences. We spend hours listening to a stranger we paid to speak about someone they never met, though they needn’t have because they focus on God 99% of the time anyways, praising His virtues and not his, telling His story and not his. Oh father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. We pay to be driven hours to a place the person has never been, then we pay strangers to dig them a grave, in which a casket made in a factory in another country is lowered, by a machine, into the small piece of earth that we also pay for. May Earth have mercy upon the man at last. Goodbye Granddad, I hope you are still able to rest in peace.